Monday, August 24, 2015

Don't Tell Me I'm a Good Mom



I'm a bad mom. I sleep too late. I don't cherish every moment. I complain when my daughter wakes up in the middle of date night. I leave her on the floor so I can get on Facebook. I let her cry. I leave her diaper on too long. I get impatient when she cries. I don't do these things all the time, but I do them enough. I'm a bad mom.

When you compare me to some moms, maybe I'm not too bad. I may make mistakes sometimes, or have a bad day every now and then, but in general, I'm a pretty good mom. I don't abuse my Bumblebee. I breastfeed, cloth diaper, play with her, read to her, don't let her watch TV.... By a lot of standards, I'm good enough.

Here's the thing, though. I don't want you to tell me I'm good enough. I'm not! I am a bad mom. I'm also a bad wife, a bad sister, a bad daughter, a bad friend. Why is that? Because I'm a bad person. I'm a bad person because I'm part of a fallen world. I'm a sinner. I will never be a perfect mother, wife, sister, daughter, friend. I can try and try, but I am incapable of being good.

When you tell me I'm a good mom, I know you're lying. You may think I am, but a truly good mom wouldn't do those things. She wouldn't ever let her daughter cry. She wouldn't ignore her baby. She would never become unreasonably upset with her child. When you tell me I'm a good mom, and then I do one of those things, I feel guilty. I feel like I've failed. The weight of being a bad mom gets heavier and heavier, and the more I feel like a bad mom, the more likely I am to do bad mom things.

When you tell me I'm a bad mom, but I've been redeemed, I feel relieved. I know I don't have to carry the weight of being a bad mom around any longer. I can try again. I will try again. And I will fail again. I will never be a good mom, because as a sinner, I can't stop sinning. But as a redeemed child of God, I am a good mom.

So the next time you hear me say, "I'm a bad mom," don't jump to correct me. Agree with me. Say, "Yes, you're a bad mom. But that's okay, because Someone died to redeem that bad mom. You're now a good mom, not because of your power, but because you've been washed by the blood of Jesus Christ!"

On this earth, I am simul iustus et peccator; I am simultaneously good mom and bad mom. One day I will leave this body behind and no longer carry the weight of being a bad mom, but until that day, I will acknowledge that I am a bad mom, because a mom who's good on her own doesn't need Christ. A bad mom does. And I need Christ.

I'm a bad mom.

2 comments:

  1. Hello Dakotah Gumm. I am a Pastor from Mumbai, India. I am glad to visit your profile on the blogger and the blog post and know your interest in the Youth Ministry as well as your interest in sharing the Gospel and promote a family based Church. I am blessed and feel privileged and honored to get connected with you as well as know you through your profile on the blogger and the blog post. I love getting connected with the people of God around the globe to be encouraged, strengthened and praying for one another. I have been in the Pastoral ministry for last 37 yrs in this great city of Mumbai a city witha great contrast where r4ichedst of rich and the poorest of poor live. We reachout to the poorest of poor with the love of Christ to bring healing to the brokenhearted. We encouraged young and the adults from the west to come to MUMABI to work with us during their vacation. We wold love to have young people from your church to come to Mumbai to work wtih us during their vacation time. I am sure they will have alife changing experience. My email id is: dhwankhede(at)gmail(dot)com and my name is Diwakar Wankhede. Looking forward to hear from you very soon. God's richedst blessings on you, your family and the ministry.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hello Dakotah Gumm. I am a Pastor from Mumbai, India. I am glad to visit your profile on the blogger and the blog post and know your interest in the Youth Ministry as well as your interest in sharing the Gospel and promote a family based Church. I am blessed and feel privileged and honored to get connected with you as well as know you through your profile on the blogger and the blog post. I love getting connected with the people of God around the globe to be encouraged, strengthened and praying for one another. I have been in the Pastoral ministry for last 37 yrs in this great city of Mumbai a city witha great contrast where r4ichedst of rich and the poorest of poor live. We reachout to the poorest of poor with the love of Christ to bring healing to the brokenhearted. We encouraged young and the adults from the west to come to MUMABI to work with us during their vacation. We wold love to have young people from your church to come to Mumbai to work wtih us during their vacation time. I am sure they will have alife changing experience. My email id is: dhwankhede(at)gmail(dot)com and my name is Diwakar Wankhede. Looking forward to hear from you very soon. God's richedst blessings on you, your family and the ministry.

    ReplyDelete